lol !
Where do you find a dog with no legs?
Spoiler
Right where you left him.
Notifications
Clear all
"Doctor, I've broken my arm in several places" Doctor "Well don't go to those places."
lol. I guess we are the only two person who post's here.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Spoiler
Ground beef
Originally posted by SirPaulius
lol. I guess we are the only two person who post's here.What do you call a cow with no legs?
Spoiler
Ground beef
What do you call a cow whose right-side legs are shorter than the left-side legs?
Spoiler
lean beef
LOL ///////
They laughed when I said I wanted to be a comedian - they're not laughing now.
A guy walks into a doctors office with a carrot in his ear and a piece of celery up his nose.
The doctor told him he wasn't eating right.
A three-legged dog walked into a saloon in the Old West. He sidled up to the bar and announced, "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."
A man sits at a bar.
‘What’ll you have?’ asks the bartender.
‘A Scotch, please,’ replies the man.
The bartender hands him the drink, and says, ‘That’ll be five dollars.’
The man replies, ‘What are you talking about? I don’t owe you anything for this.’
A lawyer, sitting nearby says to the bartender, ‘He’s right. In the original offer, which constitutes a binding contract upon acceptance, there was no stipulation of remuneration.’
The bartender is not impressed and tells the man to finish his drink and get out.
The next day the man returns.
‘What the hell are you doing back?’ says the barman. ‘I can’t believe you’ve got the nerve to show your face here!’
The man replies, ‘What are you talking about? I’ve never been in this place in my life!’
‘I’m very sorry,’ says the barman. ‘But the resemblance is uncanny. You must have a double.’ So the man says, ‘Thanks. Make it a Scotch.’
Why did the boy fall of the swing?
Spoiler
Someone threw a fridge at him.
Why did the plane crash?
Spoiler
The pilot was a tomato.
Originally posted by VorpalF2F
A man sits at a bar.‘What’ll you have?’ asks the bartender.
‘A Scotch, please,’ replies the man.
The bartender hands him the drink, and says, ‘That’ll be five dollars.’
The man replies, ‘What are you talking about? I don’t owe you anything for this.’
A lawyer, sitting nearby says to the bartender, ‘He’s right. In the original offer, which constitutes a binding contract upon acceptance, there was no stipulation of remuneration.’The bartender is not impressed and tells the man to finish his drink and get out.
The next day the man returns.
‘What the hell are you doing back?’ says the barman. ‘I can’t believe you’ve got the nerve to show your face here!’
The man replies, ‘What are you talking about? I’ve never been in this place in my life!’
‘I’m very sorry,’ says the barman. ‘But the resemblance is uncanny. You must have a double.’ So the man says, ‘Thanks. Make it a Scotch.’
Epic!
How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a light bulb?
Let’s go play on our bikes.
What did one tampon say to the other?
Spoiler
Nothing, they're both stuck up cunts.
The girl said she knew me from the vegetarian restaurant, but I’d never met herbivore.
I was reading a book about anti-gravity the other day. I just couldn't put it down.
Phil Laak find Jennifer Tilly unconscious in his bathroom. He realize that Jeniffer's bra has exploded in her face because of her big boobs. Jeniffer is awake and Phil Laak is furious. He scream : Come on Jeniffer, you wear 32B size bra when your boobs are 36DD, it is so sick and ridiculous. You should have put more money in your bra and buy a better and bigger bra because of your big boobs. That would have been a good investment in the long run. Jeniffer is crying then answer : I am so sorry Phil, but i am convinced that
Spoiler
Patrick Antonius had bigger boobs than me!!