My kids won't eat leftovers, so my wife said, "Just throw them out"
So I did.
I still don't know what to do with the leftovers
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Yesterday we would have been celebrating my wife's 40th birthday.
Unfortunately due to drugs and alcohol — we all forgot.
A man walks up to the widow at her husband's funeral and says " May I have a word?"
"Sure", she replies.
"Plethora" says the man.
The widow says, "Thanks. That means a lot"
My son tried to tell a Dad joke.
It failed horribly.
I said, "Don't worry lad, you'll be able to do them easily when you're groan up"
