Gambler Turning It Around and becoming a Poker Player 2nl to 100nl

hi guys ive never used bankroll management ever ive basically gone on rushes and run something up to spew it off playing a casino game or too high so as result deposit and put far more in than ever taken out had some very big blackjack roulette losses too, basically im more a degenerate gambler that also likes poker, more omaha than texas holdem i fell out of love with texas year ago really im more focused when play omaha kinda spacey dont give a crap when playing texas and tilt easier.
Anyways guess ive reached the point where im fed up redepositing and also tired of repeating the same pattern get something going then shoot myself in foot then dig the hole grave deeper, i also have tilt issues mental game issues relating to focus boredom impatience etc (got some issues outside of poker in personal life relating to my health too both physical mental and cognitive issues too now ha which related to physical so basically im bit f@cked and a mess ha regardless).
ive kinda got to get on top of this issue sooner rather than later now as i am addicted to gambling truth be told i cant even lie ive gambled away money i need for food etc gone completely broke far too many times and unnecessarily .
i basically need to reinvent myself, not be a gambler anymore and find or more refind my love for poker and that be enough and the way i get my gambling fix while still playing strategically hopefully profitably.
im down to my last £20 lost £260 playing blackjack and know if i lose this i cant gamble or play for like a fortnight (and honestly that will leave me depressed stupidly) sad as it is even though i gamble silly amounts risk far too much as in everything i got on a coinflip its the feeling your chasing really and the moneys just the tool, if i could get a buzz gambling pennies i would.
Anyway im going to ban the casino and play poker only from now on self exclude myself and use bankroll management and play strategically, and cause i dont want to function play off of a big large bankroll im not playing tournaments and im not playing omaha, im going to just grind at texas holdem and hopefully climb up the stakes to a stake where i can make a decent hourly from my hobby and have fun then ill re-evaluate goals as be big one just getting there ha :happy:, i need to rekindle and find my love of texas holdem though thats forsure as i dont pay attention lose focus too easy now playing it (so dont think adjust correctly auto pilot too much cant be arsed yet confused while still playing ha, have more fun messing about while playing it annoyingly now whereas previously i really did enjoy thinking battling) and tilt too much and spew too much and its due to i dunno guess lost love passion for certain spots they dont interest in same way actually just sort of annoy me ha basically knowing i should fold or shouldnt done something yet still doing it, basically ego can end up getting involved in texas little easier than omaha for me too.
aiming to try really take this goal seriously so im going to try play 1500 hands per day as apparently thats when poker becomes skill according to one article on internet so seems good baseline.
also just playing on PokerStars for now mainly as simplifies it lotta games running (can ban casino) so should be people swimming in there worse than me, also can use hud so multitable which is handy cause means should be able to get to long run quicker potentially bigger hourly? cause if i played on an un-tracked site i could only play 1 table honestly cause i need to focus heavily on opponents so i can make a strategy for them so if multi tabling without hud id just miss too much info and play too in a vacuum way, once i got to stake where the likely hourly for one table is good whatever that may be then sure ill go on untracked sites and play some more on them cause i actually love single tabling poker and playing hudless when im focused, multi tabling even with hud you can zone out quite bit lose edge focus and never get the same winrate you can get playing fully focused on opponents even when not in hands and table dynamics single tabling.
anyway enough rambling.
wish me luck, skill, health and emotional, tilt control etc please.
Cheers me Dears.
In a bit.


last night played 1500hands few over $27 up