Spoiler
big time whineage ahead
after today, i decided to quit for a while, this is just too much for me to handle....
built my BR from $10, this morning i started playing with $372, now, ~400(!) hands later, im down to $280
suckout after suckout, bad beat after bad beat, cooler after cooler....
mostly because players making dumb plays and getting rewarded big time - i know im supposed to be happy about those guys, but i just cant do it anymore....
im srsly afraid of logging in and playing.
i was about to start taking shots @ NL20, now i can just about move down to NL5, if i only lose a couple more...
what the heck do you do after a defeat like this? i need some serious advice 
take a look at my last 300 hands, and tell me if this is normal... from what i understand, downswing can take thousands, even 10's of thousands of hands... ill be bankrup after this is over
1)
Preflop: Hero is MP3 with A♦, K♦
SB posts small blind ($0,05), BB posts big blind ($0,10), MP2 folds, Hero raises for $0,30, 2 folds, SB 3-bets $0,95, BB folds, Hero calls
Flop: ($2,10 - 21 bb) A♣, 7♦, 3♠ (2 Players)
SB bets $10,02, Hero calls
Turn: ($22,14 - 221.40 bb) A♠ (2 Players)
River: ($22,14 - 221.40 bb) Q♠ (2 Players)
SB shows Q♥Q♦
2)
Preflop: Hero is BU with 6♥, 6♦
SB posts small blind ($0,05), BB posts big blind ($0,10), 2 folds, CO raises for $0,30, Hero calls, SB folds, BB 3-bets $0,80, CO calls, Hero calls
Flop: ($2,75 - 27.50 bb) J♣, 6♠, 3♦ (3 Players)
BB bets $2,10, CO folds, Hero raises for $11,10, BB calls, Hero gets uncalled back ($1,64)
Turn: ($21,67 - 216.70 bb) Q♣ (2 Players)
River: ($21,67 - 216.70 bb) K♠ (2 Players)
Villain shows K♥K♦
3)
Preflop: Hero is SB with K♣, T♦
Hero posts small blind ($0,05), BB posts big blind ($0,10), MP3 calls, CO folds, BU calls, Hero raises for $0,45, 2 folds, BU calls
Flop: ($1,20 - 12 bb) T♣, 7♠, 2♦ (2 Players)
Hero bets $0,70, BU raises for $3,44, Hero calls
Turn: ($8,08 - 80.80 bb) 8♠ (2 Players)
River: ($8,08 - 80.80 bb) 9♠ (2 Players)
Villain shows K♠T♠
4)
Preflop: Hero is BB with A♥, A♠
SB posts small blind ($0,05), Hero posts big blind ($0,10), 3 folds, BU raises for $0,20, SB folds, Hero 3-bets $0,70, BU 4-bets $1,20, Hero 5-bets $3,20, BU calls
Flop: ($6,45 - 64.50 bb) J♦, T♥, 9♥ (2 Players)
Hero bets $10,53, BU calls, Hero gets uncalled back ($1,57)
Turn: ($24,37 - 243.70 bb) A♣ (2 Players)
River: ($24,37 - 243.70 bb) 2♠ (2 Players)
villain shows K♥Q♥
5)
Known Players:
CO: $10,26 - 103 bb
BU: $4,90 - 49 bb
SB: $12,77 - 128 bb
BB: $11,51 - 115 bb
0,05/0,10 No Limit Hold'em (4 Handed)
Hand recorder for this hand: PokerStrategy.com SideKick 1.0.51206.2
Preflop: Hero is BB with Q♥, Q♣
SB posts small blind ($0,05), Hero posts big blind ($0,10), CO folds, BU calls, SB folds, Hero raises for $0,30, BU 3-bets $0,60, Hero 4-bets $1,30, BU reraises for $2, Hero reraises for $6,05, BU calls, Hero gets uncalled back ($2,85)
Flop: ($9,85 - 98.50 bb) K♦, J♣, 2♥ (2 Players)
Turn: ($9,85 - 98.50 bb) 4♥ (2 Players)
River: ($9,85 - 98.50 bb) 4♣ (2 Players)
villain shows J♦J♠
i dont usually tilt, but i cant take this anymore
villain calling 5bets w/KQ, flopping straights
villain openshoving $10 into $2 pot w/QQ on Axx board vs my AK
hows this even possible, cant i just take a break?
hand after hand after hand after hand..... weird, i never remember myself running this hot...
sure, in the long term, ill be winning those hands...after i bust my entire bankroll?
i worked so hard to get $10 to where it is, and now im gonna just lose it all?
being comfortable playing is i think very important.
and surely you won't bust it if you move down for a while.
