I think it’s a good time to sum up my last year. I found somewhere article/post where author ask two questions. First one was “How your life change in last year?” Second one was “Are you happy with your changes?”. I thought for a while and said: “Oh Fuck!” I knew it’s great time for some reflections and it’s great time to think about things I’ve learned in last year. I’ll write something for future me to track my progress. I do Post Session Analyses after almost every session so I want to track my life in the same way.
How my life changed in last year? It’s actually funny because at January 2013 I told myself I want make this year, year of courage. I did what I said. I literally fucked up my comfort zone. I move out for the first time in my life. For the first time in my life I approach to a chick in straightforward way and told her what I want. I did it three times. For the very first time I told chick who I care about, about my feelings and intentions. I had three of those chick in my life, I always had problems with talking honest with them and long story short I fucked up.
Now I am dating with this chick, I am not sure how it will end and to be honest I don’t give a fuck I did my best, I forced myself to do things I was afraid of and if it’s going to work it’s great if not I am sure I’ll do the same with next chick who make me feel the same way because it will be easier to do it for second tie. I went full time poker pro. I multiple my earnings by 5-6 times now. I pressed 100 kg on bench press (with very bad technique and I injured my shoulder but whatever). I used to be addicted to weed and alcohol (I was running away from my problems) so I made break from drugs and alcohol for more than year. I improved my physique and do other smaller stuff like write on my blog every single day for literally half year (check my first post date at pokerstrategy eng if you want to make sure, first post was 19 Jan). It was start of challenge made by Gordon. Of course work with him has biggest influence on my life and I am very, very glad we start working together, it’s huge life changer.
From time to time I find some goals that I write down earlier in my life. What is funny most of them are already achieved. Save XXXX in cash, pff done. Bench 100kg, pff done. Speak fluent English, pff done. Approach in straightforward way, pff done. Move out, pff done. It’s fucking amazing how you can change in just one year. I also want to share with most important things I’ve learned this year.
1) Drugs and alcohol is not an answer
As long as you don’t ask me, what I am goona do in my free time…. 
Just kidding. If you are depressed you will be depressed. If you feel nihilism you will feel nihilism. It change literally nothing. Don’t get me wrong I like to smoke some weed or drink wine with chick but I know it doesn’t relax me as much as sex or work out. It doesn’t relax me as much as walking lonely and thinking about life. It doesn’t solve any of my problem (water doesn’t solve them too) so I think it’s a bit overrated. Anyway I am still doing it from time to time. Why? Pure hedonism I guess.
2) Life is too short
Life is just very short and you should be aware of it. Of course time is relative. Six hours with beautiful women pass like 6 seconds. Six hours of playing poker pass like 6 minutes. Hour and a half of training pass like ten minutes. Six hours of free time pass like six years…. Anyway when I start live more dangerously( I moved out I live from poker, I do a lot of things that are away from my comfort zone) I really don’t feel safe but I don’t need to. I feel much more alive and I feel happier about stupid shits like eating good meal with chick and drinking wine, or going out to hang out with friends. The more I am aware it can be over next day, the more joy I get from my life.
3) Cooperation gives you a lot of value.
I used to like to do most things on my own, until I start work with friend of mine on mindset. At the beginning you need make the rules and after that you need to abide them. It helps you push yourself harder when you work with someone who has the same goal. Of course it isn’t like in books. “Come one dude! Let’s do it together, I’ll inspire you a bit!” It’s rather “move your lazy ass fucktard, you want to give me your money, don’t you?!” Sometimes you think: “I hate this crazy mother…this fucking bi…. Why the fuck we did so many commitments, now I need to the them…..” and if you don’t feel like doing something you just imagine how he takes your money, how he makes fun of you and say things like “don’t worry don’t do it I’ll buy something for your cash, I saw something nice yesterday” and just swear and do your job. It’s great to work with someone, sometimes you get frustrate and blame them but you still do your work, even at 4.30 AM……
4) People leave
I learned how great it’s working with people but it’s a double-side sword. People can help you do your best and they can stop you. I was a friend with one guy. We were knowing each other since kindergarten it’s something like 15 years. He was stopping me all the fucking time. I wasn’t aware of that. When I start to work out it was “come one dude, don’t be a pussy, grab a beer, don’t tell me you are going to work out, are you gay or something?” I wasn’t aware of that and he was doing it with chicks, with earnings, with study and with everything. He did it for so many years and when I realized it our friendship was over. Some people want to be best by making other small and some want to be the best by making themselves biggest motherfu… out there, those people also support their friends, because they like competition with better people. If you haven’t learn it yet, you’ll probably do unfortunately in a hard way. Also you change and some people don’t or you don’t change and some people do, you will just leave them or they will leave you. It’s normal. Fortunately there are also a few people who will improve with you and I hope those people are friends for whole life.
5) Courage is a skill
Courage is not a lack of fear. It’s facing it. Fear is overrated. It always seems much worse than it is in real. When you understand it, it will be easier to move up with your life. When you do one thing that scares you other things becomes easier and after a while (year/two/ten) you gonna be unstoppable . It will get easier and easier. In some way I like the feeling when I am shaking, my heart is bumping, my legs are shaking and I hardly breathe.
6) Best plan is no plan
It’s kind of funny because I was person who always want to have plan for everything. I set up my goals and I was trying to achieve them. Now I just don’t believe in goals. Life change too fast to have specific goals. Adaptation is far more important because you are not aware of new possibilities and chances. You are not aware how good you become in year from now and that’s why maybe you will get more than you thought. That’s why I don’t believe in long term goals. I just believe in priorities, without them you won’t achieve anything, with them you even don’t need goals or plans you will just adapt and achieve your things much faster. Know your priorities and everything will work just fine.
7) Progress isn’t static it’s dynamic
At the beginning your progress is very hard to spot. You can’t make that huge progress and you work hard on everything, without great results, once you get better at one thing and master it, everything else become easier. That’s why athletes are so successful at poker. That’s why when you earn more money it become easier to earn even more. You know better, you are better, you have more potential and you can chose more options. Rich get richer, poor get poorer. Health get healthier, sick get sicker. Wise get wiser, stupid are more stupid.
8) How you do one thing is how you do everything
It’s funny because when I improved my work ethic in poker my whole life improved. I mean when I train I do my best. Other people at martial arts give up after xx pushups when they hit the floor. It’s weird for me because when I once hit the floor I can stand up and do some pushups once again and then I fall again and stand up and I do them once again. It’s easy to spot there are some people who train for years and they suck at it. It’s not a shame to hit the floor it’s a shame to not stand up until job is done. We should know our limitation but usually pain isn’t our limit. If you stop when you feel uncomfortable or when you feel pain you achieve nothing. You’ll have a lot of struggles and you need to learn how to face the. And fight again. I am very happy I chose martial arts because I can improve there my mindset.
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