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A little boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, ‘This is the most foolish child in the world. Watch me.I prove it to you.’
The barber puts a dollar banknote in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, ‘Which do you want, son?’ The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
‘What did I tell you?’ said the barber. ‘That child never learns!’ Two hours later the customer sees the same young boy coming out of the candy shop.
‘Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar banknote?’ The boy licked his candy and replied, ‘Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!’
Q: If you got hungry, and all you have is a calendar, what to you do?
A: Eat some dates.
Mod note: I had to hide that last joke.
This is the "bad jokes" thread, and that one wasn't bad 
What did the pony say when he sang with a sore throat?
Sorry, I'm just a little hoarse!
There is a restaurant on the moon now.
The food is good, but there's no atmosphere
There is a restaurant on the moon now.
The food is good, but there's no atmosphere
A guy saw a girl wearing a shirt just like this one:
He said, "28-C"
He gets out of hospital next Tuesday
One day the Library was lonely with no one in it for the librarian to help. These two chickens came through the door screeching "bouk bouk." The librarian quickly got up and gave them each 5 books. The two chickens left satisfied. Just a few minutes later the same two chickens come through the door with no books screeching "bouk bouk." The librarian once again jumps up and gives each chicken 15 books this time. The chickens leave satisfied once again. Then again for the third time the chicken return screeching "bouk bouk" But this rime being suspicious the librarian gives each chicken only one book because they have still have not returned the other books. As the chickens leave the librarian slowly follows behind to see where all the books are going. The chickens come to a stop and start throwing the books into a pond where some frogs grab the books and throw them behind their back croaking "red-it red-it"