These are some of my favourite ones:
To achieve the impossible dream, try going to sleep.
You can go a long way with a smile. You can go a lot farther with a smile and a gun.
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.
When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself.
Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer,
a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.
The problem with the world today is stupidity. I'm not saying there should be a capital punishment for stupidity, but why don't
we just take the safety labels off of everything and let the problem solve itself?
Never be afraid to laugh at yourself, after all, you could be missing out on the joke of the century.
Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity.
That's how rich I want to be.
The trick in life isn't getting what you want; it's wanting it after you get it.
“Trust yourself. Think for yourself. Act for yourself. Speak for yourself. Be yourself. Imitation is suicide.”
