+++Q&A with Jared Tendler!!+++

hey Jared,

had a semi-tilt session today and ain't sure about the cause.

I had eaten well, slept well, no worries or other stuff. I followed my warm up procedure (ok thinking of it, didn't have clear goals for the session) and started playing with 100% focus, taking a shitload of notes, only few tables etc.

Nevertheless I played bad. I made moves like 3betting 37s OOP even though I know it's bad, especially in 180s where ABC game owns. Still, I couldn't control myself and kept making moves like that, that look cool when they work out but in general are -EV.
Wasn't running well, but that doesn't have such a big impact, the other day I ran a lot worse and still managed to play 2-3 hours of absolute A-Game.

I don`t get it. Last month was the most successful one of my poker carreer, I prepared, I was relaxed etc.
Usually I find a good reason for why I played bad or had some tilt issues, maybe you have an explanation on this one cuz I'm quite lost.

Hey,

First off I gotta say; love what youve done for the community with this thread, obviously its a win/win situation but the detail and effort put into the answers really is quite amazing, thank you.

Mentalgamr really hasnt been a big problem for me, but Im coming to a point in poker where I really feel motivated to crush, and even the smallest flaw in my mentalgame is unacceptable longterm, so a question of my own arose.

This issue is not only related to poker but also to life in general as it hits me there aswell, unfortunately its hard to explain as I seem to lose control pretty hard.
What happens is I play vs. Soneone I have history with, I hit a strong hand and so I continue to try to lure him in, expecting and reacting to the expectation of his move, and when he somehow differs from this I simply lose control and snapcall, without analysing the situation as it is. An example would be betting 2 streets and then setting up a check/call river perfect, expecting my opponent to bet close to 100% of his range, but then villain overshoves river instead and the situation changes, however I dont get to adapt as Ive already snapcalled.. whats up with that?
I rmember a similiar reaction so well in real life. I was playing a football match away with my team, I really sucked, but I saw my chance and I took it, and from there on until I “woke“ up having missed the shot I really never remembered a thing. this was many years ago. Might it be thesame problem?

Sorry for typos, you got me hooked so I felt I just had to write asap, android@work on New years, super degen, haha!

Edit: The loss of control, tilt, starts the second I see him overshoving instead of just betting, and stops right after I see the results, just as the football example. Often the pot has been brewing quite intensly, I probably really want too much when this happens?

Thank you!

Originally posted by JaredTendler
Many of you may have noticed my absence from this thread and my sudden return answering all remaining questions. I've been hard at work on The Mental Game of Poker 2, which I'm aiming for release on April 23, 2013. In order to get there, I need my focus to be as tight as possible, especially over the next three months. So, I won't be answering questions until February at the earliest.

For those interested in the next book, the quick bit is that it's entirely new material (not advance tilt control or more info around the topics from the first book). Basically book 1 is designed to get rid of the crap in your game: tilt, fear, and motivation and confidence problems. Book 2 is designed to help you see how good you can get. Things like playing your A-game/zone more consistently, learning poker skill faster, increasing focus, playing more tables/hours or mental endurance.

I'm really excited about the material for book 2 and will update the thread when I make more details public soon.

Damnit, it seems I am too late..
Good luck with your new book, Ill be picking up the first one soon.

Edited this post. Had an idea to do something here, but decided to pursue another avenue.

Very apt post on this subject. Just a 'bonus material' type link - http://jaredtendlerpoker.com/blog/making-new-years-resolutions-stick/

Originally posted by VBlue
Very apt post on this subject. Just a 'bonus material' type link - http://jaredtendlerpoker.com/blog/making-new-years-resolutions-stick/

Great, only can recommend this as well! ♠_cool:

What would you say if Viktor Blom calls you and ask for mental Coaching?

Probably a stupid question, or you have probably had one these before, didn't really want to scroll all pages here... BUT... How not to care about the money when playing? Any stakes. Because I know that when you think about the money when you play especially when you lose some, it had very bad impact on your play even when winning, and also that slows down your overall progress. So how to put money aside in your head while playing?

Hi Jared, I read your book twice now and it really helped me for a short period of time. Now I'm back to old habits, although to a much lesser degree. This time I tried to write down the problems and the possible solutions. Any feedback and suggestions would be greatly appreciated:

My Mental Game Problems:

1- During a downswing I kinda lose my motivation to play, I start to doubt my skill and start to forget my long term goals. My "off the tables" work also suffers, I find reasons not to post hands for evaluation, watch less videos, etc. I start to fear another losing session.

2- Mistake tilt. When I lose a big pot that I think I played badly I start to feel anxious and I lose focus. A bad beat only affects me in a sense that makes it more likely that my session will be a losing one. The bad beat per se doesn't affect me if I'm sure I played it right.

3- Fear of Failure. I want to be successful in poker really bad, I think that puts a lot of pressure in my results and that makes me fear losing.

4- I think I have a lot of "tilt over tilt". Meaning that it tilts me that I'm starting to feel tilted, that I'm having fear of failure and so on.

Possible solutions:

- Try to measure success besides $. Literally quatify after each session the quality of my play and the quality of my mental game during the session.

- Establish and write down short term goals (ex: at least 1k hands per day, post at least 2 hands for evaluation per day)

- Plan down a rigid warm up program: review long and short term goals, make goals for the session (ex: 3bet more in BU), listen to favorite song and watch inspiring photos.

Thanks for your patience everyone. Jared has just finished working on his second book, so I'm hoping he will be coming back to this thread in the next week or so (though be patient because he is also getting married soon so very busy all round).

When will that book come out? /me drools

Originally posted by Kyyberi
When will that book come out? /me drools

Not official yet, but we are hoping April 23. It's done, but now its all the printing type of stuff holding it up.

Originally posted by BarryCarter

Originally posted by Kyyberi
When will that book come out? /me drools

Not official yet, but we are hoping April 23. It's done, but now its all the printing type of stuff holding it up.

I can confirm the book will be available on the 23!

Hey everyone,

I know it's been a while and I haven't been around. I basically locked myself away for the past three months to finish up the book. I've found that I’m at my best when I’m very focused on only a few things. But, the great news is that the book is done and I'm really proud of how it came out, and very excited to share it with you.

For those who are interested, I've released the first chapter, which gives an overview of all the chapters. You can find it at the bottom of this page.

That page is also where you can pre-order the book and be eligible for three promotions I'm offering. First, if you order before April 23 you'll get 20% off. And, if you order before March 26, I'll sign and personalize your copy. Plus, you can participate in a free private webinar only for those who pre-order. I'll be hosting the webinar sometime in June and it will give you a chance to ask questions about the book, or your mental game. To be eligible for both these promotions, enter coupon code: signed in your cart.

The pre-order is only for softcover copies. Ebooks will be available in all major formats on April 23 - just not pre-orders. An audiobook is planned, but not date is set at this time. It takes me a couple months to complete and I'm getting married on May 19th! So, it's most likely that the audiobook will be out sometime later this year. The softcover is also available for pre-order through Amazon, Barnes & Noble and most booksellers.

The new book is not just a rehash or additional material from the topics of the first book. It's filled with all new material about all new topics and it centers around helping you to play in the zone consistently. Basically, it's designed to move the front end of your game forward so you can reach even higher levels of performance. The first book helped to eliminate (or reduce) tilt, fear, and other mental game problems, or move the back end forward. Now with those problems out of the way, the second book will help you to see how good of a player you can become. Check out the free excerpt, you get a solid idea of what the book is all about and there's a table of contents listed there too.

So, I am back answering questions and will soon get started on the older ones. I'm going to be taking a much needed long weekend/vacation pretty soon, so I may not get to your question immediately, but I do promise to have them answered within the next few weeks.

Hope everyone is doing well. Talk with you again soon!
Jared

Jared, great to hear the news of TMGOP2. Congratulations on getting it finished.

Enjoy your upcoming vacation (if you get one) and of course the Wedding.

When you do get chance, if you look back at the last couple of pages I am once again finding similar problems relating to focus, motivation, etc.

I seem to be very good at the theory and poor at putting it into practice. Maybe I don't schedule in enough time consistently to keep embedding these thoughts. Perhaps I still haven't found the real underlying reasons, or maybe I am a bit at odds with giving time to poker. Also, I find myself tired from my week, so choose to chill instead, or disinterested due to a run of variance and play on auto-pilot more.

I think because I have never made any great leaps in my game or made any really good money (other than the odd big 3 figure score) that I also feel a little deflated and defeated. Perhaps a good score would give me the hunger again. I can't help but feel a little like poker is a poor way to spend my spare time either - though I do enjoy the game overall.

This must be something people feel a lot. I could be helping a charity, or trying to build a career for myself by investing the time in enhancing skills or knowledge, or taking the time to play sports/exercise - which all may well be much more productive things to do.

Can't shake off the feeling of wanting to do well though, but just don't think I commit enough to do so. Time is as always my biggest obstacle to getting everything done that I want to.

I still find myself forgoing post-session hand analysis and pre-session work in favour of just playing. Even TMGOP takes a backseat and I keep putting it off 'I'll start it again next week and just play tonight' type attitude. I am sticking with my online coaching course and have done some other live coaching this year so I have been focused on improving.

More discipline, better planning of my time and commitment to it I think.

Any thoughts as always are greatly appreciated.

Originally posted by alphabeat

Originally posted by JaredTendler

Originally posted by alphabeat
Hello Jared,

2) I tend to stop playing once I've made a few dollars and spend a lot of time reading articles, instead of putting in more tables. Call it winners tilt? Except the win can be as few as a couple dollars.

We can call it winner's tilt, but this tilt I suspect is really fear of losing back what you've won. Which make me suspect that you have some difficulty having a losing session. Playing SNG's you need to learn how to become a good loser. I'm not saying you want to be motivated to lose, but knowing how to deal with losing is VERY important in poker, and especially in SNG's.

Heh, yup, you struck the nail on the head of that one. Having a losing session puts me in a bad mood for hours to come. (esp when I've played badly, as opposed to being sucked out on. So Hopefully, that will get better, and not worse, with time) So I shall work hard on my game and try not to look at balance after every set.

Many thanks!

AB

Excellent! Glad we nailed it.

How things been going the past several months??

Originally posted by bashpepe89
Thanks a lot Jared. Since my post was 2-3 months old some things have changed already, but many issues are still there and I'm going to fight them based on your advice.

Gonna write again when I see results and/or reach a point where I don't get any further, trying to keep it a lot shorter then

Great to see your show back online, I usually listened to them afterwards, but if it's anyhow compatible with my timezone I definitely try to tune in live more frequently.

Keep up the great work!

Thanks very much!

How's it been going lately? Making progress?

Originally posted by VBlue
Jared, great to hear the news of TMGOP2. Congratulations on getting it finished.

Enjoy your upcoming vacation (if you get one) and of course the Wedding.

When you do get chance, if you look back at the last couple of pages I am once again finding similar problems relating to focus, motivation, etc.

I seem to be very good at the theory and poor at putting it into practice. Maybe I don't schedule in enough time consistently to keep embedding these thoughts. Perhaps I still haven't found the real underlying reasons, or maybe I am a bit at odds with giving time to poker. Also, I find myself tired from my week, so choose to chill instead, or disinterested due to a run of variance and play on auto-pilot more.

I think because I have never made any great leaps in my game or made any really good money (other than the odd big 3 figure score) that I also feel a little deflated and defeated. Perhaps a good score would give me the hunger again. I can't help but feel a little like poker is a poor way to spend my spare time either - though I do enjoy the game overall.

This must be something people feel a lot. I could be helping a charity, or trying to build a career for myself by investing the time in enhancing skills or knowledge, or taking the time to play sports/exercise - which all may well be much more productive things to do.

Can't shake off the feeling of wanting to do well though, but just don't think I commit enough to do so. Time is as always my biggest obstacle to getting everything done that I want to.

I still find myself forgoing post-session hand analysis and pre-session work in favour of just playing. Even TMGOP takes a backseat and I keep putting it off 'I'll start it again next week and just play tonight' type attitude. I am sticking with my online coaching course and have done some other live coaching this year so I have been focused on improving.

More discipline, better planning of my time and commitment to it I think.

Any thoughts as always are greatly appreciated.

Hey Mark, Thanks! I'm really excited about it.

When you say you're having similar issues related to focus and motivation, are they exactly the same? Has anything improved? What specifically hasn't improved.

The reason these questions are important is because it can be easy to look at the problems you're currently experiencing and assume that nothing has improved, or for them to "feel/seem" exactly the same, when in fact, there has been progress. Clearly not all the progress you want, but if you have made progress, then that means what you've been doing is working to some degree. And, if you there hasn't been any progress we need to figure out why.

My sense is that you're basically looking to find out if the time you're putting into poker is going to be worth it. It's a little ironic that a big score would motivate you, but the work you need to put into your game is what will give you your best chance at getting it. Seems a little backwards don't you think to be wanting a big score to motivate you? That's why it makes me suspect that really you want to know that the work you put into your game is going to pay off, or be worth it. Plus, with your questions around charity or building a career, etc, your trying to figure out, in general, what the best use of your time is.

And I suspect that part of what may be holding yourself back is a bit of a fear of making a mistake. Ie, choosing the wrong use of your time. Which is now putting pressure on you to make the right/perfect decision ahead of time - which in practical terms is impossible.

Better discipline and planning will come, once you have a clear direction of where you want to be heading.

What do you think?

Hey sir,

I am studying your first book with a couple of friends and I am a little confused about the "improving the back end of your game" concept.

First what is the back end of my game ? One way to look at it is to say that a poker player has x knowledge of poker and when he is playing his a game he is accessing all of it (conscious competence + unconscious competence) and when is playing his worst he is only accessing a smaller %, only that knowledge that is at UC ?

So the solution would be to observe which skills are not at the level of UC while playing his worst and to drill them until they are there ?

Are you viewing this differently ? How else can a player find his weaknesses without actually playing his C (F) game ?

I do think meditation can be helpful, but I wouldn't say for most players. Meditation, in my mind is important for building awareness/recognition, building emotional/mental control, and for keeping the mind clear. There are other ways to accomplish these benefits - so I would say to players who have a natural interest in it to try it. But I wouldn't say that all or most players need to use it.

You posted this on page 3.

What are those "other methods" ? ♦

Originally posted by DeMarcohsp

First what is the back end of my game ? One way to look at it is to say that a poker player has x knowledge of poker and when he is playing his a game he is accessing all of it (conscious competence + unconscious competence) and when is playing his worst he is only accessing a smaller %, only that knowledge that is at UC ?

Hi DeMarcohsp,
When I went through the book, I interpreted this to mean that you had to correct the mistakes you were making, before you could make advances with new techniques etc.

In my case, I have been playing 5-Card Draw, and I had been making lots of bad calls, and playing way too many hands.

Once that was corrected, I was then able to use the saved blinds to take some calculated bluffs and so on -- this wasn't possible when I was struggling to break even.

All the best,
--VS